The Little Drummer Boy learned that Christmastime gift-giving is more personal than material. By honoring Jesus as a newborn in the manger, the boy’s “pa-rum-pum-pum” song has encouraged generations to offer ourselves up—as presents truly “fit to give the King.”
Ideally, our offerings will convey not only something unique to the individual, such as the gift of music, but also a God-given attribute worth sharing with others at this moment in history.
We can be inspired by the tune’s lyrics describing an immaterial but profound Christmas offering which made Mary nod, Jesus smile, and the young drummer endure as a holiday icon. His special present, and ours, can be a timely and timeless promise that brings God and man together.
The tribute to bestow is simply an affirmation of our humanity. Consider this an ongoing pledge of intimacy and solidarity, recalling the incarnational joy found throughout the Scriptures: “Behold, God’s dwelling is with the human race. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people.” (Revelation 21:3)
The gift is well-suited to these days when our essential nature faces a crucial encounter with artificial intelligence. We’re battling immersive artificiality and dumbed-down intelligence, forces which tend to divide the divine and the temporal.
Novelist and commentator Walter Kirn voiced this secular state of urgency in an America This Week podcast after citing recent headlines about outbreaks of violence and hatred. “There’s a real weakening of the human self going on,” he observed.
More hopeful news for humanity has made headlines. It emerged from the corporate world of communications and marketing. Thanks to a decision about branding, your favorite radio station or podcast may have started repeating its own pledge this month. You’ll notice it as a boldly stated slogan: “Guaranteed Human.”
As Editor and Publisher reported on Nov. 26, “iHeart Media is doubling down on its positioning as one of the last ‘truly human’ mass-reach entertainment platforms” amid a “media landscape increasingly shaped by AI.”
iHeart, the world’s largest podcast publisher and owner of more than eight hundred radio outlets, has made “Guaranteed Human” an official part of its identity—restated during those top-of-the-hour station identifications which are legally required in broadcasting.
An executive told Editor and Publisher that iHeart’s platforms now promise they will not use AI-generated personalities. Nor will they play AI music featuring synthetic voices which mimic humans. Podcast hosts will all be human beings, too.
Of course, it’s possible that AI will creep in through commercial sponsors. Some news and other content may be written using the technology. Behind-the-scenes decision makers may still garner advice from task-specific “AI agents” analyzing their business.
Nevertheless, we’re told this basic “guarantee” has sent other media leaders and music producers scrambling. They must match or counter iHeart’s new doctrine, a preferential option for the human.
Most noteworthy is the awareness that a promise to “be real” is suddenly necessary. The company was smart to realize its challenge: Podcasts and radio programs are valued companions for countless people, and the content is known to provide crucial, trusted links within geographical areas or communities of interest.
The media giant also did revelatory research to support its statement. An iHeart memo reported by Inside Radio included these findings:
- Among listeners, 90 percent want their media created by real humans, although 70 percent acknowledge using AI. Also, 92 percent say nothing can replace human connection, up from 76 percent in 2016.
- Nine in ten respondents said AI cannot replicate human trust.
- Three-quarters expect AI will complicate their lives, and 82 percent worry about the impact on society. Two-thirds fear that AI might someday go to war with humanity.
These are clear reasons not only to salute iHeart Media’s wisdom, but to consider how we audience members might adopt the same “Guaranteed Human” label. “Merch” touting this statement didn’t come out in time for Christmas, but it seems inevitable.
Imagine wearing a “Guaranteed Human” tee-shirt to the nativity scene in Bethlehem. This presentation is relevant not only to the Christmas story, but to the message of the introductory season calledd Advent; that annual prelude prepares Christians for a historical event (when a divine person took on a human nature) as well as a future event (when Christ will come again).
Perhaps the first supernatural reaction to our tee shirts in either setting would be a smile. A heavenly voice might say, “Your pro-human logo is clever and laudable. But have you considered all the ramifications of the guarantee?”
This inquiry prompts us to ponder what the statement of identity means. We are part of a species (homo sapiens) upon which God has bestowed immense dignity, entailing rights and responsibilities. When faced with such terms of endearment, how should we comply?
This is not a question that secular culture prepares us to answer, or even to ask.
The drummer boy passed his first compliance review with no problem, no wordy report. We assume that a demonstration of humanity, if we take it seriously, implies lifelong endeavors to discern and heed the guarantee’s content.
Assistance for our future compliance comes from the Magis Center, a Jesuit-run institute for Catholic catechesis based on rational and science-based evidence. Ironically, as of 2025, research into human nature is aided by the center’s “magisAI,” an authoritative chatbot which instructs, rather than panders.
Its database, informed by two thousand years of Christian teaching, assures us that people don’t need to avoid AI completely. When circumstances warrant, it makes sense to use artificial intelligence as a tool to turbo-charge our learning.
Our first question for the chatbot explores the belief that God made humans unique because of our immortal souls. Asked about this, Magis says, “The soul, in philosophical and theological terms, can be understood as the immaterial organizing principle of a living being.”
A soul “actualizes and directs its matter (body) toward life and its specific activities or ends,” according to magisAI. These ends would include nourishment and growth (in the case of plants), plus self-movement and sensation (in the case of animals), plus intellect and will (in the special case of human persons).
The human soul organizes the body’s physical processes toward powers that are ours alone—“rationality, intellectual knowledge, and self-consciousness.” We see relationships among ideas, so we have the capacity for reflection, abstract intelligence, and free will.
We can express complex concepts, even universal thoughts, with sophisticated language, Magis continues. Unlike other animals, we have a conscience. We are open to impulses of the ego, but also to choices between good and evil. Ensouled persons can gain knowledge of God and moral law. In lieu of these essential qualities, we would be “merely physical machines without true freedom, moral responsibility, or the capacity for higher spiritual experience.”
AI technology is indeed a “physical machine” lacking access to, or interest in, a relationship with the divine. Jesus came to earth not to launch us toward materialistic transhumanism, but to bestow an intimate, salvific God-man connection, as taught in the Gospel. (John 3:16)
Even though some tech gurus think we’re on the way to an “artificial super-intelligence” which mimics a god, humans have the distinct advantage of being made in God’s image and likeness.
Let’s proceed to ask, “What are the crucial qualities of being a human?” Here, magisAI offers insights into how persons shall put our guaranteed humanity into action. One excellent purpose is spreading the Gospel message to a secular culture which hungers for the transcendent.
Our essential nature and consciousness are rooted in what philosophers and theologians have called “transcendentals,” Magis explains. Humans “uniquely possess an awareness of and desire for” five things: truth, love, goodness (justice), beauty, and a sense of being at home. What’s more, we want to experience these in their perfect totality, not just in occasional samplings.
“This awareness drives humans to seek limitless horizons and fulfillment beyond what is algorithmically and materially determined, indicating … a spiritual dimension to human nature,” says Magis. The impetus toward higher, fuller reality yields rich bonuses in our lives; our yearning gives us a knack for wonder, contemplation, creativity, and imagination.
Meanwhile, our dignity provides the crucial groundwork for human rights and ethical principles. Persons deserve respect and protection in our pursuit of the transcendentals, regardless of individual abilities or characteristics.
All these insights combine to imply this: When we assure others that we are committed to being human—increasingly in contrast to being mere copycats of artificial intelligence, inauthenticity, and chaos—we are making a profound promise.
Just as iHeart Radio’s surveys discovered, AI promises us many amazing gifts, but we still feel a desperate need for the empowerment of companions who agree that “we’re all in this together.”
It sounds like full compliance with “Guaranteed Human” could be nearly impossible not only among iHeart’s broadcasters and audiences, but throughout society.
However, we need not be discouraged by the work ahead of us.
One hopeful way to keep humanity in the holidays—and in our earthly future—is to foster continuous remembrance of, even celebration of, the plentiful joys and capabilities of homo sapiens.
We can return to marveling at the record of civilization-building, the long historical arc of innovations which have improved material circumstances, and the enrichment of providential and scientific collaborations pursuing truth, beauty, and goodness. On the micro level, we can recollect and retell our many experiences of individuals’ qualities, big or small, which transform lives.
Of course, humans will often be on the defensive when declaring inherent worth. Those who doubt our dignity will stress all sorts of past and present missteps, the role of free will in causing great misery, and our failure to live up to the potential of faith or reason. Nihilists and utopians will portray humanity as a flaw, not a feature, in the march of progress.
We do need to cultivate bold, wise leadership in such fields as governance, religion, and education (the humanities, liberal arts, and sciences) to help liberate us from self-centeredness and thoughtlessness. The goal is to grow in forgiveness and humility, trustful discourse and critical thinking, so we can advance our compatibility with God and each other.
Families, friendships, and soulful communities will help us to share compelling, surprising stories about the material and immaterial gifts we’ve received in good times or bad. At its worst, artificial intelligence pretends to weave personal stories which are merely billions of stolen narratives rejiggered according to patterns, not priorities.
Catholic News Agency reported on Dec. 25 that the patriarch of Jerusalem urged drawing hope from the story of Christ’s activity in the past, present, and future. In his homily at the Christmas Eve Mass celebrated in Bethlehem, the cardinal said God “does not wait for history to improve before entering into it” but rather embraces all of human reality.
That’s why the Little Drummer Boy is a story of “guaranteed humanity” we should preserve. When we stagger from the apparent complexity of all the potential good and evil, excellence and imperfection of humanity, our souls call us to be models for holding true to our essential kinship with God.
The boy in the song responded authentically to life’s possibilities, answering a call to reach out beyond himself with the resources a poor child had at hand. He knew he could be an instrument of dignity—one beat at a time.
Whenever we’re asked whether we know who we are and what we’re destined to do, we can reply with something vain and artificial—like technological prowess—or something simple, real, and glorious.
We’ll experience many more ramifications of humanity between this Christmas season and Advent’s final promise. But our souls can find peace because we’re always just beginning, and God is always renewing persons in his nature and ours. Each step, one beat at a time, is a chance to generously reassert our intention, or “brand identity.” This present, bestowed in each present moment, is a worthy, thoughtful rebuke to a secular world that programs itself for temporary gains at a fierce tempo.
Our most basic instincts for life’s enduring, important relationships will keep us pointed toward the transcendent, not the transhuman. The former comes with a much better guarantee.
Image from Microsoft Bing’s AI Co-Pilot. Blessings of the Christmas season to all my friends reading “Phronesis in Pieces” and OnWord.net!









